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For Guys

Top 10 funny political quotes

Comedian Billy Connolly once suggested that having the desire to become a politician should bar you for life from ever becoming one. Here are EX’s favourite political quotes, from the sharp and witty to the downright ridiculous


‘He can’t help it. He was born with a silver foot in his mouth.’
– Ann Richards, former Texas Governor, on misstatements made by George Bush, Sr. 

“I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as being decapitated by a Frisbee or of finding Elvis.”
– Boris Johnson, Mayor of London

‘I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn’t study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.’
– Dan Quayle, former US Vice-President

‘Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.’
– Groucho Marx, comedian

‘I’m honoured to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein.’
– George W. Bush, former US President

“They found more dangerous chemicals in Coca-Cola’s Dasani mineral water than they did in the whole of Iraq.”
– Robin Cook, former UK Foreign Secretary

“Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges, even where there are no rivers.”
– Nikita Kruschchev, former General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union

“Let’s pass a bill to cover the moon with yogurt that will cost $5 trillion today. And then let’s pass a bill the next day to cancel that bill. We could save $5 trillion.”
– Paul Ryan, US politician

‘We care about water pollution; it just isn’t as important as a $100 million factory.’
– Sir Henry Bolte, former Australian politician

”Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realise that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.”
– Ronald Reagan, former US President